Internal Monolouge and Lessons From 2013
Tuesday 31 December 2013 @ 15:44  0 stares
I think that this holiday has finally done some good for me. On better days, I feel content and contentment is the best feeling, truly. These days I like staying in my enclave aka room and watch shows and movies in the dark with some candle light  (currently in a scented-candle phase) and tea (NOT coffee because I fail at coffee-making) while wrapped in cosy shawls, sweaters and socks. These things make me feel so at ease and safe I just get overwhelmed by how blessed I am to enjoy such little joys. Existing is becoming a lot easier, it shouldn't ever be hard and as of now I have resolved to lead a better, much more positive lifestyle.Things will only be as hard as you make it out to be. Its alright to feel under the weather sometimes but its not okay to immerse yourself in your own sorrows and do nothing to help yourself out. That is being selfish, not to mention unfair to yourself. (and others) Self destructive behaviour leads you nowhere and a little bit of positivity,- a nice thought or a favourite song can perk you up a lot. 2013 has taught me many things.

One of the lessons would be that heart-attack related jokes are far from funny, especially if you've lost someone dear to that very cardiac illness. Another thing I learnt from the heart wrenching loss is that grief is part and parcel of life, you just can't let yourself get caught up in the past. Last but not least, no matter how much grief you may feel, someone else will hurt more than you and you are not entitled to feel as if other people should grieve alongside you because not everybody understands; and that is perfectly fine. Not everybody or maybe even nobody would understand the going-ons in your head and you shouldn't expect them to. You're stronger than that and you can pull through alone, stronger than ever.

 I think that's the most valuable lesson I've learnt this year, that the only person who can be there for me is myself. I can have so much support from a dear friend but the only person who has the power to pick me up is myself. The only person who can destroy me is ultimately, myself as well. The fault of most people our age is that we think we've got life all figured out, that we're better than the ones younger than us, that life is so hard and will never get better. That is all bullshit. None of us have got life all figured out,we're not even halfway through our lifetimes (if, God willing, we lead lives of longevity) . An important tip would be to pay attention to the young ones because they know love and fear much better than we do. Adults may not know much themselves, they are learning too and their added age in numbers is no justification for the preconceived and widespread notion that they understand or know more than we do. We are all human, we are all learning. The most important thing is to always be soft and kind in our dealings with each other because we may not understand one's troubles,- or we might assume they do not exist. However,  just because some things are unseen it doesn't mean they're not felt.

This has been utterly lengthy and it would be phenomenal if you've read this far but I hope that this anecdote can be regarded as food for thought, just a little something to mull over.
SONG OF THE DAY  (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧: 2013 -Arctic Monkeys
'80s
Thursday 26 December 2013 @ 19:10  0 stares
I don't know why but for the past few months I've been kinda into the 80's. As a child I grew up listening to artistes who were big during that era and much of that musical influence has brushed off on me because they were up my parents' alley. We were always listening to the likes of Bryan Adams (!!), Guns N' Roses, Bon Jovi, Def Leppard, Abba and the list goes on... Its just so nostalgic, listening to these records again and sometimes I wish had the albums in vinyl instead. Unfortunately I don't own a record player. (GOALS FOR WHEN I HAVE SUFFICIENT CASH, which might be never) Anyway, out of curiosity, I watched several brat pack films and I loved them so much. It is somehow a lot more relate-able as compared to films of the modern age. I suppose I was born in the wrong year :( Back then, Grease is what HSM is to us. It is interesting to watch such films because I get a glimpse into what my parents' lives aka entertainment was back then. OH and if you're in need of show recommendations may I just put it out there that I am currently loving 2 Broke Girls and The Carrie Diaries. Hehe, I think I love them a lot more than PLL which is getting a little tiringly mind-boggling. (Apparently Allison has no twin?? If the Twin Theory is all talk then who was in the coffin?? uGh)

Anyway, I just got back from a little shopping trip with my siblings. It was alright, just that Orchard is literally flooded with humans; claustrophobia mode : ON. I generally dislike shopping besides shopping for CDs. You don't have to scour for perfect sizes when it comes to buying albums and they're easy to pick out as well. I am so bummed that Somerset's HMV is now gone. Buying digital albums instead of physical copies takes the magic out of buying music. On the brighter side of things, Borders is said to be reopening next year so I'm keeping my peepers peeled for that. Borders used to be something like a monthly haunt for me, there really was no other place better than Borders. I've been dying to get my hands on a Frankie magazine .I'd also love to have a copy of Alexa Chung's IT, she's so effortlessly cool and funny I wish I were her. (GOAL: Be Alexa)

Hope you've been well-rested during the holidays! :)
Song of the day  (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧: 
Settle Down-The 1975
Back To Ground Zero// Let's Talk About 2014
Monday 23 December 2013 @ 14:37  0 stares
So... after hanging around on tumblr where I poured my heart out into crappy excuses I call poems and posted bits of thoughts, I decided I missed Blogger. I am still very much attached to Blogger's blogging interface and how clean everything is. Wordpress muddled with my head and I love that I can customise my template on blogger to give it a whiff of...personality and um, in this case kitty charm.

Many things have since changed, I have changed, my room has undergone drastic improvements and I am constantly trying to impove myself as well. Now that 2013 is coming to a close I can't help but look back...I definitely did not fulfill many of the things I had wished to do. I entered this year as a different person and I'm leaving it changed as well. This happens every year and I wonder, who will I be next year? Will I have the same perspectives on things? Will I still be as doubtful of my abilities or even more so?

Whatever it is, I hope that I won't come full circle again; where I struggled with things which are harder in my head than they were meant to be in reality. I just hope that I accept the decisions I make in 2014, learn more things ( and cram less), find my footing, be comfortable in my own skin, perhaps pick up a new sport, be more adventurous and less fearful. I shall not refer to these as resolutions because nobody ever completes them but they shall be 'those little things I shall and will get to later'.

And I shall make this a regular thing so...here's the Song Of The Day  (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:・ﾟ✧: 
Cornerstone-Arctic Monkeys

Have a lovely day!
newer ⇒